I know I’m going to really upset both men and women by saying this, but if a woman wants to have a relationship with a guy then she should not have sex with him on the first night. I’m not religious in any way and firmly believe in the equality of the sexes, but I think there is still an inequality when it comes to sex and I am sorry to say that men are completely to blame.
Even in the 21st century, rightly or wrongly, men will still judge a woman for going all the way on a first date, even if they are the ones pushing for it to happen. I’m sure lots of men would say they disagree, but even the most liberal man will consciously or subconsciously think less of a woman for doing the humpity bumpity on the first encounter.
It does all depend on the situation and if the woman is just seeking fun then there is no harm at all, but if seeking fun but also kind of hoping this could be something special, then a man, even the good ones, will be less likely to view the woman as a long term potential if she is all too ready for a game of bury the sausage.
This is, of course, completely unfair as it seems okay for men to be proud of their sexual conquests and promiscuity whereas women are judged as being sluts for acting in the same way as it is not ‘lady’ like. I’ve even found myself occasionally judging or feeling disappointed in female friends for getting up to sexy shenanigans with guys they had just met that night, but yet if it was a male friend I would think he’s done well. I’m sure I am not the only guy to think like that.
So ‘ladies’, men are rubbish (I think you knew this already) and have double standards in this area, but don’t let us stop you having your deserved fun. However, if it’s a guy that you think might be a long term potential, then maybe wait a little bit just to be on the safe side. The character Doris from TV’s ‘Gavin & Stacey’ perhaps said it best when advising Stacey on how far to go on the first date, “A kiss, a cuddle, a cheeky finger… just don’t go selling him the whole farm”.