Have you noticed when a man hugs a woman that in the vast majority of cases, the woman actually hogs the hug?! The man, in fact, does not really get a hug at all, he does all the hugging with the woman receiving the hug doing very little hugging back, just simply putting her arms around the man’s neck. In this modern age of equality, this seems rather unfair don’t you think?
You might argue this is not a gender issue, but merely a matter of height as on average men are taller and so it is easier for men and women to hug this way. Utter nonsense. It is much easier for the shorter person to hug around the other person’s body rather than to reach all the way up high and put arms around the neck and, similarly, it is easier for the taller person to reach over the other person’s shoulders than to reach lower around the body.
No, it is another of those silly social conventions that favour women over men, just like men are expected to pay for dinner on the first date. When men do a ‘man hug’ it is all very fair and equitable as one arm goes over the shoulder and one around the body in more of a sideways hug and the other man does the same thing. There is no reason at all for men and women who are friends not to use this approach, rather than the normal one-sided hug technique.
However, when in a relationship the sideways ‘man hug’ style approach to hugging is not quite intimate or close enough in some situations so the traditional one hugger, one huggee method is used, but why must the man be the hugger all the time?
Don’t get me wrong, giving the hug is fantastic and sometimes is better than receiving, but women why must you always hog the hug? It’s interesting to see women hug each other as the rule seems to be whoever gets their arms up first, gets to have the hug from the other person.
So ladies, instead of your seemingly pre-programmed need to be the huggee, why not try next time and be the hugger? And gents, don’t be afraid to lift your arms up higher and get the hug you deserve.
I am not bitter or a misogynist, maybe I just need a hug?