Can I date Santa?


by Jake MCMILLAN 

The advantages and disadvantages of dating Santa:

Pros

  • He will always get you presents
  • He only works one day a year
  • Looks great in red
  • Has own transport
  • Likes kids and animals
  • He lets you sit on his knee


Cons

  • He’ll only give you presents if you’ve been good
  • He eats a lot and is not in good shape
  • He possibly has an unhealthy attachment to Reindeers and Elves
  • Sleighs draw too much attention and are not easy to park
  • Technically, he’s unemployed
  • Has huge bushy white beard
  • Only wears one outfit
  • He’s not really around on Xmas Day
  • Santa is anagram of satan


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