10 Things NOT to do on a First Date


 by Jake McMillan


1. Arrive drunk

2. Call your ex during the date


3. Bring a gimp mask

4. Return from the bathroom and forget what she looks like

5. Do the ‘Pull my Finger’ gag

6. Talk about lack of improvements in tampon technology

7. Ask her how she feels about a threesome?

8. Suggest she used to be a Horse

9. Try to borrow money from her

10. Spontaneously combust

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