by Jake McMillan
A mixture of classic, new and truly lame chat up lines … would you dare use any of them?
Do you work at subway? Because you just gave me a foot long.
Roses are red, Violets are blue … I’ve got a knife, get in the Van.
Is your name Frodo? Cause your ring’s getting destroyed
You remind me of my little toe … why? Because I’m gunna bang you on the coffee table later
Rain isn’t the only 7 inches that will get you wet next week.
Are you Jewish? Because you Israeli hot
I’m an astronaut. I’d love to explore Uranus
Are you free tonight? or is it going to cost me
Nice legs … What time do they open?
You have 206 bones in your body, do you want one more?
If you were a transformer, you’d be Optimus Fine.
Is that a ladder in your tights or is it a stairway to heaven?
You’re hot, I’m ugly, let’s make average babies.
Are you from Tennessee? … Cos you’re the only ten I see
Do you have a mirror down your pants? because I can see myself in them
You like exotic animals? Wanna see my snake?
Are you related to Yoda? Because Yo-delicious
If I flip a coin…whats the chance of me getting head?”
Can I stick my Willy wonka in your chocolate factory!
What’s got 232 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My Zipper!
My magic watch tells me you have no underwear on … oh you do? It must be 15 minutes fast
Just sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that pops up
Are you legs hurting? ‘Cause you’ve been running through my mind all day
Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m rubbish at poems – show me your tits
Hey baby, do you like seafood? BECAUSE I HAVE CRABS
Do you like owls? I know a cracking owl sanctuary (Alan Partridge)
Would you like to come to a party? It’s in my pants
My love for your is like diarrhoea – I just cant hold it in.
Nice shoes, fancy a fuck?
Do you have any raisins ? No ? How about a Date ?
Hi, my cock just past away… I was wondering if I could bury it inside you
Do you have any Irish in you? Do you want some?
Does my penis taste strange to you..?
Do you have 20p? Because I want to ring my mum and tell her I just met the girl I want to nail in the toilet
Do you work for the post office because I’m sure I saw you checking out my package?
Have a feel of this shirt, do you know what that feels like? Boyfriend material.
Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don’t have a Ferrari.
Your eyes are like spanners – every time you look at me my nuts tighten.